I am not too fond of hearing the words “Let Go” spoken to me. Let go, give up control. I don’t want to hear these words from the people around me telling me to move past a certain situation and be okay with an outcome other than the one I would have chosen. I do not like hearing these words when God is telling speaking to me,
“Give up control. Let go of this and release it to me. Trust me with this situation. I have it all planned out.”
I have control issues, obviously. I have struggled with control for all of my life. I remember fighting with my younger sister over who would sit in the front seat of the car when I was way too old to be picking silly fights. It was a control issue though; I wanted control. My mom and I would get into a disagreement about something as small as whose turn it was to take out the garbage and an hour later we would still be fighting because I refused to stop talking back to her. I wanted the last word, to be able to control the conversation.
I didn’t realize how huge of a control issue I had until much later in my life, though. This year, I have realized that I have very little control on what happens to me or to the people around me. I am slowly realizing that I have to trust God’s plan and cling to Him when I don’t understand something or I wish I could control it and create a different outcome.
I have to be reminded to Let Go everyday when I want to get frustrated that plans change or friends make different decisions than I want them to. I think the reason I have such a hard time letting go of control is because I want to love and help people who are weak. I want to pick them up and give them the steps they need to take to gain strength. However, sometimes I don’t know exactly what they need for strength. All I can do is point them toward Christ to let Him lead their way to healing. It is such a frustrating and nerve-wrecking thing to let go of control. I am really struggling with the process. It has to be a mindset for me everyday to think “I don’t have control”. When something doesn’t go my way or somebody around me makes choices that I disagree with, I have to say softly to myself, “God is in control” over and over and over again to get rid of my feelings anxiety and frustration. Everyday I am trying to get a little better at letting go. As soon as I whisper those words to God, a weight is lifted. It is freeing to give your burdens to Christ and let Him have the reigns to your life. But the process can be really exhausting if you don’t focus on what is important. God has a plan for your life. Trust that He will lead you and take care of you and the people around you. It will all work out for His Glory in the end. This is such an important lesson that I have struggled with all of my life. It is becoming more evident to me that I need to make it a day-to-day priority to give up control of everything I am and everything I have. If some of you reading this have struggled with control, I hope this helps somewhat. The only solution I have reached is to pray pray pray that you can trust and let go to God.